Do you trust yourself when making a decision? You think it over and over and when you finally make the decision, you are still looking for confirmation. Like buying these very expensive shoes you are graving for for so long and when you bought them you are still looking for prettier or cheaper ones. Or even instantly regretting or punishing yourself for buying such expensive shoes. If you can relate to that then read my tips below.
4 Ways to trust yourself
Let go of control
If you think you have control over the situation, I have to disappoint you. Having control is a myth. Every decision you make, comes from the heart. We tend to rationalize it later with arguments that sound valid. If you think of any decision from a perspective of ‘having no choice’ then you will never make a wrong decision.
Having a choice and having control make us feel good about ourselves but in the end every decision you make is the right one so there are no bad choices. Trust that there is a reason why you make that decision: you either enjoy or you learn. Letting go of the control myth makes life so much easier.
No need to consult others
You are an autonomous being so you are perfectly capable of making decisions. Consulting others means you don’t trust yourself. “Do these shoes look nice on me?” or “Do you like these?”. You already know that the shoes look nice on you, because you love them. And why would you need someone’s opinion if you trust yourself. Does it make a difference?
A sales person in the shop will always tell you that the shoes are perfect for you. And if you take a friend along she will either please you and tell you that these shoes look great on you or be honest and tell you she doesn’t like them. Either way, you don’t need other peoples opinion or advice. You can trust yourself.
Check for synchronicities
A great way to learn to trust yourself is to look for synchronicities. Synchronicities are ways that energy is communicating with you. Some call it coincidences but there are no coincidences in life. Life is all energy and energy is communicating in circumstances that occur simultaneously. So while you are looking at your wanna-have shoes through the window, you see the time: 12:12 or 4:44.
These events are ‘meaningful coincidences‘ as analytical psychologist Carl Jong called them. If you grow into trusting yourself more and more, you will find that these synchronicities occur more frequently. Symbols are also very good pointers when it comes to synchronicity. When you see a butterfly or a rainbow, pause and reflect on what you were doing, thinking or feeling.
Forgive others and yourself
Forgiving is a beautiful way to free yourself from whatever is holding you back. I forgave my father – 5 years after he died – for conditioning me about “You can’t have a good job without knowing about math”, “You will never have a boyfriend when you bite your nails” and “You can never make money with being an actress”.
Forgiving other for what you blame them for a very powerful. It not only frees you from your dependence of who ever wanted to control you, consciously or unconsciously. It states that you trust yourself and that no one can tell you otherwise. As long as you hold them responsible for your doubts, you will never fully trust yourself.
Blaming others is as disempowering as blaming yourself. If you have made a decision you later regret and therefore punish yourself, you suffer. Forgive yourself for being human. As stated above, there are no bad decisions. You make them mad in your head; it’s your identification of the situation.
When you can forgive yourself for not trusting yourself, you are free. It is a journey and it takes courage to fully trust yourself. Trusting yourself has to do with gut feeling, intuition and living your life from the heart.
Trust yourself and radiate self-confidence